From a satsang with Pt. Dr. Umesh Persad, Spiritual Advisor, SWAHA Shiv Shakti Mandali of Marion Oaks, FL, USA
What makes a person truly good?
Is it kindness? Generosity? Devotion? Wisdom?
The Ramcharitmanas offers a profound yet practical answer. Goswami Tulsidas teaches that one of the highest qualities of a saintly person is even-mindedness: the ability to remain balanced, compassionate and principled in spite of how others behave.
This is not merely a quality reserved for saints. It is an ideal that every sincere spiritual seeker can cultivate.
The Fragrance of the Flower
Tulsidas beautifully compares a saint to a fragrant flower. One hand plucks the flower from its stem, causing it pain. Another hand gently holds and preserves it. Yet the flower offers the same sweet fragrance to both.
Such is the nature of a truly noble person.
Whether treated with kindness or cruelty, praise or criticism, they continue to respond with compassion rather than resentment. Their goodness is not determined by the behaviour of others, but by the values they have chosen to live by.
This is not weakness. It is tremendous inner strength.
Seeing Beyond Friend and Foe
Ordinarily, we divide the world into categories: those who support us and those who oppose us; those we like and those we dislike. Our minds naturally favour one group while resisting another.
The scriptures invite us to transcend that limited way of seeing.
A person established in spiritual wisdom understands that each individual is on a different stage of life’s journey. Some uplift us. Others challenge our patience. Yet each offers an opportunity to strengthen character.
Instead of asking, “How should I treat this person based on how they treat me?” we begin asking, “What response reflects my own highest values?”
The Internal Battle
Being a good person does not mean we never experience anger, disappointment or frustration. These emotions are natural. Each human being feels them.
The challenge lies not in preventing emotions from arising, but in preventing them from controlling our actions.
Sanaatan Dharma reminds us that our minds are constantly influenced by the mental winds of life:
- gain and loss
- praise and blame
- honour and disgrace
- pleasure and pain
These experiences test emotional stability. If the mental foundation is weak, we are easily swept away. If it is strong, we remain steady despite changing circumstances.
True spirituality is not the absence of life’s storms. It is learning how to remain anchored through them.
Practising Even-Mindedness
Internal balance does not appear overnight. It is cultivated through conscious practice.
The journey begins with a simple decision:
Choose peace over reaction.
These simple practices gradually strengthen our capacity to respond wisely instead of reacting impulsively.
Respond, Don’t React
The Yoga tradition also offers practical guidance for relating to others.
When we encounter happy people, let us respond with friendliness rather than jealousy.
When we meet those who are suffering, let compassion arise instead of impatience.
When we see virtuous people, let us admire and learn from them rather than envy them.
And when we encounter those whose behaviour is harmful or destructive, we need not hate them or become entangled in endless arguments. Sometimes the wisest response is respectful distance, preserving both our peace and our principles.
Not every battle deserves to be fought.
Learning to Say “Yes”
Many of life’s frustrations arise because we resist reality.
We wish circumstances were different. We wish people behaved differently. We wish losses had never occurred.
Acceptance is not surrender.
Acceptance simply means acknowledging, “This is what is.”
Only when we accept reality can we respond wisely to it.
The calmer the mind becomes, the clearer the judgment becomes.
Becoming the Fragrance
The world will always contain both flowers and thorns, kindness and cruelty, praise and criticism.
We cannot control the actions of others.
We can, however, choose the fragrance we leave behind.
May we strive to cultivate minds that remain calm amidst life’s winds, hearts that continue to serve even during challenges, and spirits that never allow the behaviour of others to diminish our own goodness.
For in becoming even-minded, compassionate and steadfast, we take one more step towards the Divine.
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