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Religious and Spiritual

Managing Anger

In the fiercely competitive, materialistic world in which we live today, challenges, stress and tension have become the norms of daily life. People going through anxious moments are a common sight, whether in the home or in the streets. We quickly become a slave to the emotion of anger. Left unharnessed, it leads to total ruin.

According to the principles of Sanatan Dharma, anger is considered a deadly enemy that must be harnessed and controlled.

Indeed, anger is a gateway to hell; it leads to destruction. This point is made by Shri Krishna in verse 21 of Chapter 16 of Bhagavad Gita, where the Lord says:

“There are three gates leading to hell: lust, anger and greed. Every sane man should give these up, for they lead to the degradation of the soul.”

Shri Krishna also speaks of the consequences of anger in verse 63 of Chapter 2. He says:

“From anger arises infatuation, from infatuation, confusion of memory, from confusion of memory, loss of reason, and from loss of reason one goes to complete ruin.”

So how do we manage this negativity? In order to control our anger it is important to look at its root cause. Merely treating the symptom is not enough. Sometimes, anger is a negative emotion manifested from frustrated attempts to enjoy sensually in the material world. Such anger must be checked and controlled, for it is a symptom of ongoing material hankerings. Just as treating a fever alone would not cure a disease, treating anger without understanding it to be a symptom will not extinguish the unwanted behaviour. In such instances, to conquer anger, we must first ask how can conquer lust.

Bhagavan Krishna has explained the three aspects of anger in the Bhagavad Gita: the causes of anger, the consequences of falling prey to this emotion and the solution to curb it.

 

He says in Chapter 2, verse 62: “While contemplating the objects of the senses, a person develops attachment for them, and from such attachment lust develops, and from lust, anger arises.”

Lord Krishna explains in the above verse that getting angry is a four-step process. They are:

  1. Contemplation of a sense object.
  2. Development of an attraction for it.
  3. Development of the desire to possess it.
  4. Development of anger when the desire is unsatisfied.

The problem first arises when the senses come in contact with the sense object. Therefore, the easiest solution must be to control our senses and nip the problem in the bud. By focusing less on the material aspects, attraction and desire would also be diminished. The possibility of becoming angry is therefore reduced.

This process takes time but constant awareness is necessary. Here are a few simple practices that we can use the next time we are tempted towards erupting into angry reactions:

  1. Be patient when others display anger towards you.
  2. Take a walk away from the situation for a few minutes.
  3. Practise ‘kshamaa’- forgiveness. Not everyone is at your level of understanding.
  4. Practise ‘dayaa’- compassion. Understand that others may be carrying a baggage of woes which can take the form of domestic, financial, health and other problems.
  5. Practise ‘pranaayaam’. Take a few deep breaths. This helps to restore some degree of inner ‘shaanti’ (peace) which would provide you with a clearer vision of the situation and a more stable reaction.

Understanding that everyone is fighting a battle of some kind should help us to treat all with respect, kindness and love. Being aware that each of us are sparks of the Divine should also guide us towards a more humane approach. In this way we would have little or no expectations of others in our daily interactions.

Additionally, control of the senses helps us to avoid attachment and unnecessary cravings. We would have less mental baggage to carry and would be far away from the gateways of hell. Consequently, there will be fewer disappointments leading to anger.